There is no there. There’s now. Now or never. There’s this. Yet you cling to the seductive mystique of that, there, and then.
I’ll be happy when… I’ll be successful when… I’ll be fulfilled when… I’ll be chillen when… I’ll be content when…
Well… When?
41 stories erected into Tokyo’s night sky, I stood face to pane with a picturesque panorama deserving of a premium postcard. Pondering…
100 million eyes of electricity stared squarely into my soul. I marveled at my insignificance. WOW.
One day… One day it’d be incredible to be here. One day… One day this could be my reality.
All I’d need to do is start focusing on bringing in some more money. I can do this, I know I can. If I just adjust myself and shift some of my priorities, I can get here. Seriously, it may take a few years, maybe even a decade, but if I give this goal everything I’ve got, I’ll get here.
We all desire the finer things in life, figuring we’ll find fulfillment through them. I’m no exception. God bless us and our ambitions to get there.
Welcome to The Park Hyatt in Tokyo, Japan – currently rated as one of the top five Hyatt hotels in the world. Life is good. And the air wreaks of affluence. It was stunning. It was glamorous. It was elite. And I itched to be there someday.
I was waiting for my Pops to come back from our room on the 42nd floor. We were staying in the hotel for four days as part of our father/son trip to Japan. But you knew that. We scored this sweet stint by each applying for a Hyatt credit card which gives you two free nights at any of their facilities. That’s four free nights in total (and two free round-trip flights from New York to Tokyo gained via another credit card we each applied for). The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree – but it rolls.
We were living the dream. Make no doubt about it, this joint was filled with high-class ass. Starting at over $500 per night, it was an experience I desired to duplicate numerous times in my life. And one day… One day, I’d get to the place where I could be here with these peeps for real. I’d get there.
Fantasizing about all the finagling that’d have to ensue, for a series of seconds I contemplated various business plans conducive to building the bank account and amounting the degree of affluence necessary for attaining this experience. And then…
BAM. A sudden jolt of CPR for the soul, my shoulders slid back and my solar-plexus protruded forward.
A moment of clarity… Vivid awareness… Truth…
There is no there. There’s now. Now or never. There’s this. I AM ALREADY THERE.
I don’t need to change business plans. I don’t need to wait a decade. I don’t need to fantasize about finagling various financial ventures.
When is now… When is here… When is this…
You’ve got goals… Ambitions… Aspirations… And I love that about you. Make no mistake, it’s a beautiful dimension of your deeply cultivated character. Happy people have projects. I’ve got ’em too. But when our goals continuously stand between us connecting and fully experiencing now, when we sacrifice our current capacity to love and be loved based on the idealization of eventually getting there, then those same goals counteract the unconscious motive our ambitions seek to satisfy.
Happiness… Love… Fulfillment… Appreciation… Bliss…
It starts now. It lives here. It resides in the intangible.
The ineffable never exists in an alternate moment.
One day… is today.
If you take the time to appreciate what we have, I’ll meet you there.
If you question where it’ll lead… I’ll answer you, but where else…
Here. There.
Now. Forever.
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Hey Jacob! I really enjoyed this article because this is something I try to make come alive in myself and the people around me. I call it "are you REALLY living?" which means are you choosing to do what makes you happy? Are you living in the now? Are you enjoying your life now as you have wished it to be to this point? Basically as you put it, there is no there, there is now. It's so important for us to realize that this IS our life right now as it is. This is where we are. If we keep waiting for that someday our blind eyes will keep missing what blessings we have RIGHT NOW. Thanks for this post today. I have someone I can share it with.
FUCK to the YES! 🙂
Damn Jacob. I love your writing style. The abundance of alliteration adds to the awesomeness of the lesson. I admire your articulation.
I think this a key lesson for anyone trying to better themselves, especially the ambitious, because I find our ambitions can sometimes trap us in the future. They can breed a "rat race" mentality that forsakes the present for sometime later. I think a good way for ambitious people avoid getting trapped in the "there" it to re-frame our goals towards present experience/process rather than the end-result/objective. For example:
Objective Oriented Goal: Build a 6 figure online business.
Process Oriented Goal: Experience the process of building a 6 figure online business.
It's a small change linguistically but I think it translates into big change mentally as it transforms your focus. You start to care about each step on the mountain rather than just hitting the peak. And really, when you break it down, the last step on the mountain is no different than the first. They all should be celebrated. This shift also has more flexibility for failure because even if you fail you are still fulfilling you goals because making mistakes as you go is part of the process.
The satisfaction we get from the attainment of the end-result is so fleeting. Then we move the finish line ahead once more. A new peak to climb. The majority of life takes place in the "in between." That's where we need to place our attention.
And what if all our wishes are fulfilled and we become that person we want to be with that life we want to live, how will we look back on who we are now? Wouldn't that future self want us to savor the becoming? It's all apart of the story. We should cherish it. All of it.
Love it, Mike! You're so right about how we might reflect on our present selves in the future. So often, I've looked back at times when I was striving for something else, when I thought something needed to change, only to realise that I never actually had it that bad in the first place. Appreciating the present moment is a tough thing to do in a culture that's so goals-oriented, but the fact is, THIS is life. This is the only moment that's guaranteed. And when we can get lost in the moment and love what is, that's where we're likely to find that elusive thing called happiness.
Jacob, I really love this post. As I told you, you just keep raising the writing bar higher and higher. And I had to laugh when I read what you were thinking about being in Tokyo and dreaming of the time when you'd be able to get back there. I was saying to myself, "But you're already there!" And that's the realisation you came to as well, of course 🙂
This post got me thinking about goals, and how the pursuit of more, more, more, faster, richer, better, can make us neglect mindfulness. But it's a bit of a dilemma, because without goals and ambition, where are we going? I read a quote this morning by Scott Dinsmore: "It's funny to see what happens when you take a shot at Crazy Dreams… They tend to become Crazy Realities." If you don't have a dream, how are you gonna have a dream come true…? But I think you articulated it well when you said that it's when our goals become prerequisites for our happiness that we unwittingly forfeit the very happiness we're chasing. It's a balancing act, as ever 🙂
YES. YES. YES. Incredibly well articulated, Rebecca. Thank you for putting yourself out there!
And… I'll being doing a post on the importance of long-term goals soon. 🙂
Insane (in a positive way) Clarity through this text Jacob, you nailed it. I can feel my mojo flowing again after reading the article and all its comments. I'm about to refresh my goals and I got obsessed with them, completely forgeting about savouring the now again. Can you imagine my anxiety? All released now.
Thanks for the memo and for all comments and tips about goals, very insightful! Hakuna Matata.
Sergi
YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAH bro!
So thrilled to see all the progress you're making from all the skills you've patiently, persistently, and diligently cultivated. It's inspiring!
Keep in touch, Sergi!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UIJjK3IV3E0
Thanx for sharing, dude. You ripped it. 🙂
Jacob,
Right on target. I was actually thinking of writing a book about this topic and calling it "We are all so stupid" – haha, no kidding. It's funny how we defer happiness for later, once we do X or Y, only to exchange our current problems with another set of problems once we reach the goal we aimed for.
I got into a mindfulness experiment this month and it is already helping me be more focused on the now.
Cheers!
Maria
Love your passion. Thanx for the connection, Maria! 🙂
Your words were transformational as I felt I was standing on the roof in the skyscraper in Tokyo with you. Thank you for sharing the strong message that lends to everything in life. I can tell you enjoy rap music because your blog was lyrical that borderlines a song..
So dope, dude. Thanx for sharing your experience!
Whooooooooooose woooorld is thissssssss…
You are a magical being. Your light is so bright and powerful enough not only to illuminate yourself but others as well.
Thank you for being there.
And thank you for being you, darling! 🙂
You really found a way to make this whole prosces easier.
I’ve been surfing online more than three hours today, yet I never found any interesting article like yours Easy Dating Club – Does Online Dating Works?. It is pretty worth enough for me. Personally, if all web owners and bloggers made good content as you did, the net will be a lot more useful than ever before.
That’s the smart thinking we could all benefit from.
Jacob,
Thanks! I work & plan on somewhere, someday but for today, I am HERE and lovin it. Awareness is a gift and for the dose you delivered again today I am grateful.
Merry everything to you and yours.
Mary
Haha! Too cool. 🙂
thank you Jacob,
just what i needed.
thanks for the reminder of what we somewhere already know as truth deep within. no coincidence!
YES! My pleasure! 🙂
Fuck yes Jacob! So eloquently put. This has been my biggest struggle. Bringing my focus back to the present, even though I love my goals so much. Gotta save some of that love and channel it into the present.
Hahaha. Some words from the legend: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pAyKJAtDNCw
Thanks brother for that. Totally right.
Anytime, bro!
Couldn't agree with you more! You're right on point in this post.
Life rewards those who take action instead of waiting for some sort of action to act on them.
I've been on both sides and I know that you have to put in the effort and go for it if you want to see results.
A body builder would never expect to be in peak shape without taking action.
A language learner would not expect to learn a new language if they didn't put in the effot.
And a student wouldn't never expect to be a doctor without putting in the education and training needed to get to there.
The best time to act is NOW!
Wordup!!! 🙂
Reminds me of the story of the fisherman and the businessman (you've heard this one, Jacob, I bet) 🙂
{Short version}
The businessman tells the fisherman he should upgrade his boat, hire people, so he can make more money, so he can one day retire to spend more time with his family and fish casually . . .
. . the fisherman says, "That's what I'm doing already. . ."
Ultimately, here and now is all we have. The present is where time connects to eternity. . .
Thanks for sharing your moment of insight. It's important to keep in mind: we are already there, we have everything we need, right now.
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