Firstly, i would just like to BIG myself up for the unparalleled excellence i displayed in adapting to the Z and Y swicharoo on these Croatian kinda keyboards. New neuro-pathways are created, set, and actively in use.
Secondly, i would like to admit i am a swamp-style smelly bastard right now….. and I’ve NEVER been happier about it. Allow me to elab…
In the last couple of months, I’ve been able to identify my “fundamentals”… This is what happens when you cross a commitment to life-long-learning with a phenomenal amount of free time (in the world’s clock, and my mental clock). Add in some inspiration + ambition, and sprinkle a delicate dose of freedom-funk dust to top her off. So what the freakness are “FUNDAMENTALS”???
Fundamentals are the things we do in our day, that when we do ’em, we operate as our BEST selves. These are the things that, YOU KNOW, if you do, you’re gonna have a better day, and a better life, because of having done. Every homosapien has ’em, and they are different for each one of us humans. –Side note: I’m going to write an article in the future talking about Fundamentals, Strengths, Virtues, and how figuring out what ours are, and practicing them consistently, can help us LIVE our lives with more UMPH (and happiness)! — So my fundamentals are:
- Meditating – connecting to something spiritual / relaxing / letting my mind take a time out
- Exercising – getting my blood flowing/ my body moving / my heart rate really rocking
- Creating – making something / journaling / writing / pickturing / drawing
- Learning – expanding my mind / reading / listening to some inspiring audio / researching
- and Playing – (this one is way way way under the radar and is a MUST) with cats / buggin’ out being funky in the house / being playful in conversation / CONSCIOUS FUN!
Sooooo why am i so happy that I’m “a swamp-style smelly bastard right now” – because I’m back on my fundamentals today! I woke up, meditated for a half hour, went for a real slick run up and over and through some Split streets. Now I’m creating, and later I’ll definitely do some reading. That leaves the remaining load of today’s work which is: playing. (I would also like to emphasize my respect for nap-taking, and eating nutritiously)… When I’m home, THIS is what i practice, everyday. These are the principles I’m building my life around (yes – i did just say that i am building a life around taking naps.)
So, what happened in Europe over this last week – that may be what you expected to read about – and well, that’s what i expected to write about until, this happened: I caught a cold / flu / fever / infection / or whatever the kangaroo’s cock / donkey’s dick you wanna call it… I trace it back to a lack of continual nourishment, and depriving my body of the royal-receiving treatment it at times admittingly underappreciatingly abides by at home. I’m not used to 20 hour episodes on the train, drinking out late for a couple of nights in one week, pizza and ice cream 4 courses a day, or just even missing my morning broccoli and spinach green drink. (i literally had a dream about one of those today… ahhhhhh). Ok – so since we last spoke:
Berlin, Germany – Really liked it… General impression is people are pretty smart there. Even 65 years after the Holocaust, the feeling of that black cloud creates shadows in the otherwise sky blue country. New memorials are still being built in memory, and although people really don’t talk much about what happened, i felt the feeling of it subsiding in the collective unconscious of the people who resided there. All in all, people are super friend, especially the youth – intruding into conversations to help translate, or stopping to help with directions when they weren’t asked to do so.
Prague, Czech – A-OK… Prague always gets bigged up by anybody i ever hear talking about it. Personally, i haven’t had THAT experience there: the amazing MUST MUST MUST make it there one i hear so frequently. That being said, go check it out =)…
One memorable moment was when we got stopped in the rail-system without proper documentation proving that we paid the fee for our train passes (you know, the ones that we didn’t)… The New Yorker busted some moves along the line of saying: If we stopped you in NY, we’d let you go… We had no idea we needed to pay for the train, its cool, don’t worry, well get out and walk… And my favorite move was pulling my pockets inside out to show her i had no money… (in my front pockets at least =)… It would cost us about 70 US dollars each, but we left with a big banging heart and a sincere THANK YOU, as we made our way up the escalator to the streets. In that instance we felt like what some Canadians kids called us earlier in the week: BAMFs (Bad-Ass-Mother-Fuckers)
My most intense experience came as i grew some kahunas and decided to face the fear of the shadow of the holocaust… I suddenly decided to go check out the concentration camp outside of Prague. It took us two days to finally figure out how to get there but once we did, all i kept thinking was WINDOW, WINDOW, WINDOW….
Very, very, VERY strange….. As we walked around the grounds and into the cells, and we listened to the tour guide give her daily dialog about the stats, something strange happened to me. Almost immediately my emotions shut down….. I didn’t feel sympathy, i couldn’t feel empathy, no sadness, sorrow, happiness, or any other emotion. What i felt, was like an icicle. So for the first hour there i walked around, taking in all the facts with a blank face. THAT, i coulda saw coming… it was the next thing that caught me off gaurd: i stopped intellectualizing.
I had heard enough, people being beaten and torchered, seeing the minimal amount of food they were giving in one day (about the third of the size of ONE of my 5 daily meals), 50 diseased people being put into a 10 by 10 room with one window. My mind COULD NOT do anything with this data. So my intellect evaporated. My emotions went else where. What i did get, was a primal, instinctual, sensation-like, vibration-type, tingling in my bones. It was my souls reaction to the horror. I felt it physically. A silent understanding that i could not understand. An acceptance of, not being able to accept it.
I was initially going to title this post: the wonders of a window….. As we made our way through the camp, we wandered into cell after cell, bunk after bunker, getting dark after darker. I can vividly envision passing this one cell, and Edgard pointing out “Yo, theres no windows in this one”… I don’t think a window ever meant so much to me as in that moment. I mean, one small, tiny, rusted, crappy, 2 x 4 bar baring window, was more meaningful than anything else that i could think of at the moment. It symbolized freedom, hope, aspiration, life, god, goodness. Seeing the juxtaposition of the beautiful beautiful beautiful country day, with the horrors of this horrendous horrid cell – drove a deep chill into my bones.
That night we left Prague and set out on a night train to Budapest, Hungary. As i stood looking out of the trains windows at the nighttime eastern European country side in motion – i kept thinking thoughts of being rounded up onto that train, against anything of my doing, and being sent to be prisoned, torchered and possible killed. FUCK. The feeling of freedom returned me and I reminded myself: as i live MY life, what i CAN be , i MUST be. That is my destiny.
I knocked out shortly after that, and from what I’ve been told, at around 3am – a strange Slovakian man grabs Edgard’s leg, yanks it, and starts speaking jibberish. Voices escalate and now i get woken up…. I realized it was the conductor and Edgard going back and forth, having wonders of words with each other, at a fast paced, high pitched volume. Me being on the bottom bunk, knowing, that neither one of them, knew what the hell the other was talking about encouraged an enormous smile of mine. Edgard steps out of the room we were sleeping in on the train and they keep at it… jibber jibber jibber… jabber jabber jabber… So it turns out that the Eurail Pass we have didn’t cover the time traveling through Slovakia, and even though that wasn’t one of our destinations of ours, we still had to pay for it. After about 15 minutes of comedy, the train halted, cops came on with guns, and pretty much right away, we paid.
Budapest, Hungary – BANGING… Budapest may have been my favorite city yet, although its probably due to some psychological mind-fuck funk. The first day there is when the kangaroos cock came swinging full fledged and i picked up a sickness. For the duration of the 3 days there, i left the hostel for about 5 hours total. The hostel DID have a stunning balcony that was right next to my bed, and almost each time i made it out there, i was bombarded with the sensational feeling of the genuine freedom i felt.
I wrote the majority of this when i was waiting to split from Split, Croatia. We were waiting to catch a train to take us on a 22 hour expedition through who knows where to get to to Rome. Now im in Rome, and tomorrow morning well dip to Florence.
To my mother, i’m feeling much better now… No need to ask…..
MADDD LOVE TO YOU ALL and if you actually read this whole orgy of sincere and somewhat organic thoughts, i thank you for being part of my jouney. I encourage you to leave a comment to let me know you’re on the same page ;)…..
Jacob!
PS: Make sure you check out the picks talked about in this post HERE!
PPS: This is where i was when i decided to send this out:
[mappress]