Hey home how’s it going? Ah Cool, I’m working on it thanks for asking…

Last week was a fun one as always is the case when I back strap a backpack and start city jumping; this time, island hoping.  Time and place: Last Monday, The Big Island known as Hawaii (For thou lesser enlightened, in the state of Hawaii there are several islands, Oahu being the most developed with cities such as Honolulu and Waikiki.  As well as the state being known as Hawaii, there is also an island called by the same name, or as the locals call it – the Big Island).

So I ventured off to the Big Island on Monday to find out that coincidentally (if you believe in a thing of such sorts), I would be on the island at the busiest and most eventful time of year:  the Merrie Monarch Festival which as the car rental salesman so poetically put justifying the lack of availability “It’s like the Super Bowl for Hawaiians”. It’s a Hula competition held annually in the town of Hilo: Click for specifics. The most interesting part of all this is clearly that way back when – they used to do these Hula dances topless. HELLOOO!  Although no longer done topless, tickets sell out minutes after they go on sale around X-Mas but the cool thing is that one day out of the four they have a freebee where the general public can roll on through which is precisely what we did on Wednesday.  We, being me and three pleasant girls from the hostel (Denver, California, and Japan if you must know).  It was a culturally authentic fun night that ended with creases in my cheeks from sitting on high school bleachers for 4 hours, and me taste testing everything on the menu from Poi, to Haupia, to Lomi Salmon.

That was Wednesday.  Heel up, reel up, bring it back, come rewind.  Tuesday was my twenty fifth birthday – the big quarter cent – and I went to see the (active) volcano which TOTALLY rocked, no pun intended.  From my experience, it was a humble and joyous day which with I intended to spend conversing with god in deep conversations.  However, i ended up receiving some company from Denver for the festivities.  My first impression of the volcano was “there IS life on Mars”.  I’ll send some picks but they don’t do justice to how much that place freaking looks like another planet.  Astounding and a fitting activity to live the big day in a big way.  When I spoke to my mom in the morning, she made me promise to eat some chocolate cake in celebration of the day as she would as well, and incase I didn’t get around to it, she said she’d eat an extra slice for me too – my moms the best.

Thursday was a dope day too – we took a drive around the Big Island and saw some big waterfalls and soul screaming landscapes.  It’s the closest real deal experience I had to seeing how the natives live here.  We ended the night at the hostel where the owner threw a free BBQ for the 10 or so guests.  It was a unique hostelling experience as it felt more like a home than a hostel homey.  The Backpacker’s Hostel has only been opened three months and was a church beforehand which intuitively made sense cause it had GREAT energy.  We took our shoes off when inside and there was a 15 month old little adorable Japanese/Nigerian baby busy pick pocketing me for my keys.  I had a great talk with the owner of the hostel who put me on to some ways to travel the world and make money doing so in the process.  He was a worldly dude who seemed to know a bit about everywhere and just being in his presence felt like a lesson in successful “manism”… love those moments.

Friday I breezed to Maui and checked in, and almost right back out, of a drug infested dreadlocked populated hippy vibing hostel.  Apparently Washington Square Park in the early 90s decided to migrate to “The Banana Bungalow” where there was a plethora of drugs blatantly being socially ciphered.  The 300 square foot common area turned into a sweatbox around 10pm where a bunch of youngins got shit-faced and fried their brains away.  Amongst the inviting ambiance of a manually operated half second flickering light switch, was a 45 year old lady who appeared to be on ecstasy, dancing on the pool table, pulling up her skirt up and flashing anyone who wasn’t repulsed enough to already have done the dip.  But the coolest thing about this hostel, which I single handedly liked more than ANY other attribute about ANY other hostel that I EVER stayed at in the world, EVERRR, was the infestation of bed bugs.  I was a $28 decline on my credit card away from sleeping in the car that night but our room was declared clear so I left my bags in the car and stripped to almost nothing when I settled for sleep so if there were bugs, I could “shower them off” in the AM and my clothing would be free from the critters.  The sensual urges to scratch my chest, and now my leg, are creeping in as I write this. Okay….. scratched.

I took some time off from composing this composition to regroup and tone back the sarcasm.  Back before you knew it…

The foremost feature of the hostel was the free tours.  Saturday I signed up to take a tour with a group of 14 people packed into a camp-style white van that took us to the Volcano in Haleakala National Park – I hadn’t the slightest idea of what I was getting into.  12 mountainous miles and 8 hours later I got the picture.  In short, my memorable moments were many, included hiking uphill a black sand mountain aka “The Bitch”, walking THROUGH clouds (yes I was sober), and making my way up 4000 feet on a spaghetti string curved ledge looking over the crater.  Easily, one of my favorite moments came from a conversation with a broken English speaking 64 year old Japanese man who slept on the top bonk of my bed in the dorm.  When he slept, dude sounded like a vacuum and a tea kettle got into a shouting match over a parking spot – snoring basterd!   After walking for 2 hours or so with the crew we all silently stopped to regroup.  In the midst of the magically memorable moment, I asked my man “How ya’ feelin?”, to which he replied….. “ehhhhh?”. With the group in a dilapidated huddle, “I SAAAIIIID, how ya’ feelin?”…. hmmmmmm…. The look on his face was that of a baffled man. He squinted his eyes, raised his glassed up to his forehead, and said “how AM I feeling?”….. I publicly thanked him for the lesson in correct English grammar, and with an ever-so slight bow of his head, he replied “gooood”.

In conclusion, I apologize if I have made the mistake of thinking that everything that happens to me is interesting.  If you made it this far, I trust you got a kick out of some of my magic.  Right now I’m 35,000 feet above air sitting bitch in seat 7E on hour 5 of my 21 hour travel day home.  By the time you read this I’ll probably be back in my bed cuddling with my cats to the sweet song of unemployed jet lag.  Like me, my calendar is wide open so let’s make a memorable moment meaningful…